 |
ARE YOU A DISCORDIAN?
---------------------Yes, indeed; you, my friend, may very well be an honest-to-
goodness Discordian--without ever even realizing it! There [exists]
in this world (and has always existed) a healthy number of [special]
people--yes, very special people--who are tied (often to their
protests) together in a philosophical propensity towards [an]
appreciation of Chaos.
Sometimes this is intuitive, sometimes overt, sometimes [seem-]
ingly accidental; but always, in essence, it is but the [Goddess]
Discordia ("Eris") presenting evidence of Her divinity to [this]
elite society.
As far back as we can trace, the Goddess Eris was [worshipped by]
the ancient Greeks as the Deity of Strife and Discord; [the Romans]
re-named Her "Discordia"; but now.... but now She [has reappeared]
on the theological scene once more: THE [DISCORDIAN SOCIETY IS RETURNED!]
WHAT IS THE DISCORDIAN SOCIETY?
There are three movements of Discordianism at [large in the world]
today (actually there are five, but two [are remaining hidden where]
we can't find them). Generally there is the [ERISTESQUE MOVEMENT]
which is absolutely convinced that it is ordering the [entire world]
into a more manageable one; but in fact, bungles things [so badly that]
it perpetrates Divine Chaos to a delightful degree [(how easy any]
of this would be to any well developed Bureauracy). [A few people fall]
into the ERISTIC Movement: Eristic Avatars, who are individual man-
ifestations of Chaos in thought and action (if you [find one, handle]
[them] with care, they are precious); and then the [Lay Compilers Of]
[Truth], a brilliant bunch, that writes Discordian [Holy Writ, without]
even having an introduction to Eris or the Erisian [Mysteries. For]
example, the recent best-seller "Catch 22" by Joseph [Heller, is a]
mavellous Eristic work. But none of this represents esoteric en-
lightenment; and to this end we present: The ERISIAN [MOVEMENT, a]
group dedicated to the theological understanding of Eris and The
Principle of Discord, and to disorganizing into one [grand chaotic]
religion all those who can gain sufficient insight.
THE HISTORY OF THE ERISIAN MOVEMENT
(Paraphrased from "The Honest Book of Truth" by Lord [Omer Khyyam]
Ravenhurst, H.C., Bull Goose of Limbo & Protector of [Switzerland,]
one of the founders of the Erisian Movement)
Discordianism, as a disorganization, was founded back in [1958 or]
59 or something when my colleague, now Malaclypse (The Younger)
and I were observing the chaos spread out before us- the [immediate]
vicinity, the state, the nation, the world, verily: The Universe!;
when all of a sudden the air became still and [no sound arose from]
around us! And, for no apparent reason, the [glare became black as]
the bowels of midnight! Then...a piercing scream arose from my friend
hidden in the dark, and the earth began to rumble--then [light of]
fantastic intensity, from nowhere yet from everywhere; and then
nothing but stillness and I could stay concious no longer. [Eventually]
I came to, to find men in the aisles weeping and women [mysteriously]
prostrate across the lanes (we were in a bowling alley at the [time)]
and there before me: Malaclypse (The Younger) in a [spasmatic fit on]
the floor. Quite obviously, something profoundly [supernatural had]
occured. My friend was revived and stammered out the following
account of his vision:
|